Recently, I read an article about attracting and creating powerful relationships. The author explained that too often people aim to attract a partner who is a 7 or 8 on a scale of 1 to 10, but end up settling for a 5 or 6. They don’t even try for a 9 or a 10, believing it unrealistic or arrogant or overly choosy.
The irony is that they simultaneously hide or downplay their own unique qualities in an effort to fit in and to be so-called normal. They mask their true selves and their innermost desires, dumbing themselves down to a 5 or a 6.
The net result is two mediocre individuals settling into a mediocre relationship. Is it any wonder then why half of marriages end in divorce?
The solution, according to the author, is to polarize your audience by polarizing yourself. Generate 1s and 10s as much as possible.
In other words, let your freak flag fly. Don’t aim for the middle, but openly express and share your unique weirdness. And in so doing you make yourself someone’s perfect 10. And we’re not talking about mere physical attractiveness (although that could play a part), because everyone’s ideal 10 is different.
For example, if you are a Paleo-eating logistics analyst who enjoys watching reruns of Serenity while knitting Alpaca sweaters, then promote that openly to the world. Be transparent. Share it wide and far.
Don’t be like the generic masses who say, “I like to travel and go movies and hang out with my friends,” unless that is your dearest truth. Instead, be specific and bold—life is too short for average and normal. You deserve better. And so does your partner.
Because somewhere out there you—yes, YOU—are someone’s 10. Your job is to become so one-of-a-kind that you only draw those potential partners to you. You owe it to yourself and them.
Word of warning: this strategy will bring out the haters and the trolls. People might think you weird or obnoxious or disgusting. Or whatever. Who cares? These are your 1s. If you are generating 1s and 10s, you know you’re onto something.
And the haters? Forget them. Their opinions are meaningless where your happiness is concerned.
I say, don’t just be aware of your polarity, accentuate it. Expand it. Intensify it.
Life is too short to settle for mediocre.
To your good fortune!